My last post was six days ago ─ I am having no trouble at all not spending time here on a daily basis wasting my life blogging about the mundanity of my existence.
It is now two months until I achieve my 70th birthday, and the advent of a new phase of my life. I intend to spend far less time seated here working on my websites and this blog, and wasting any more of my evenings operating our T9 Android 8.1 TV Box for the sake of my drunken younger brother once he is home from wherever he has been drinking.
He spent last evening and night with his girlfriend Bev, sleeping at her home, so I was spared his company.
But on Friday evening after he was home and I had tuned in two episodes of the final season of Gotham, he kept drifting in and out of consciousness to a nearly infuriating degree.
Whenever he passes out, I cancel out of whatever show I had tuned in for us, and I leave him with the news channel we can receive through the basic cable package we subscribe to.
He will have to amuse himself with whatever he can find of interest through that basic cable package after he revives, for he does not understand how to operate the Android TV Box.
And I am able to get to bed early instead of sitting up for his benefit until into the midnight hour or even after 1:00 a.m.
But Friday evening, just as he would start to snore in his unconsciousness, the irritating sot would choke and wake himself up.
This went on and on as if to tantalize me. Every time it appeared that I was going to be able to have an early evening, he would revive just before I was able to cancel out of the Gotham episodes and switch the T.V. over to basic cable.
It was exasperating.
Well, there will be no more of this after my 70th birthday. The only T.V. I will be watching with him will be during the latter mornings when he is sober.
I want to try and develop my former walking expertise, even though as my ability evolves and I find myself farther from home, I will be in areas of north Surrey at night where I may potentially find myself at risk of harm.
As a younger man, I could have outrun any threat that I was unable to handle physically (I was never threatened with a firearm). But since knee surgery in November 2010, I am no longer able to run. I need to relearn how...but I have been too ashamed to make a public spectacle of myself trying to redevelop the skill.
And since I do not drive, I have nowhere private that I could practice running.
But I am tired of living my futile life. If I am to meet my end before ever reaching my 71st birthday, that is fine. I have nothing to live for ─ only the friendless debt that I have allowed my wife to plunge me hopelessly into.
God seems to care nothing for me nor my failed marriage ─ a failure that is as much mine as my wife's.
I have tried to earn a second income online for a decade, but my daily hours expended in that pursuit have not been rewarded.
I also keep my hand in some lotteries; but despite trying to win something substantial via that means since the latter 1960s, I have been an abysmal failure. Once I did win $1,000. However, the next largest win I ever had was not even $200.
That is unbelievably pathetic for 50 years of trying.
And so here I am, deep in debt, and with no hope of anything changing. I have no friends near whom I can visit or be visited by. I am unable to afford to travel. Heck, I can't even afford to regularly have some drinks in a bar and try to get to know some other people.
All I have is my younger brother who gets drunk every day of the week; a younger wife who works, but keeps us buried in credit debt (I think she has a casino gambling and partying problem); and two employed stepsons in their early 20s who only want to parasitically live in this heavily mortgaged house at my expense, offering as little financial help as they can.
This was not the retirement I longed for in my working life. But only a financial miracle can save me.
As of my 70th birthday, I will be done waiting for any such miracle. And although my intended walking forays will also be designed to improve my fitness and not to just put my life at risk, I intend to drink more while I am away from home. I am done conserving my pension for the sake of the monthly mortgage ─ I will force the hands of my wife and her sons to be more involved in that recurring expense.
However, enough of this talk for now.
There has been some light rain at times and lots of cloud the past two days, so I have not been out in the backyard taking any Sun.
I want to get out yet today to do some shopping, even if it is only to visit the pharmacy approximately four blocks from here where I live.
I have been more or less sticking to my daily exercising schedules, and only once over the past six days did I not include a six-minute daily plank as part of that physical regimen.
I have managed to advance to the six-minute level somewhat prematurely, for I never did get comfortable with 7½ or even seven minutes. But upon inadvertently achieving eight minutes due to an extra slow count before I finally checked my cellphone's timer, I have found myself choosing to try and keep that time as my target.
I do not keep a constant monitor of my cellphone's timer when I plank ─ it causes me undue anxiety because of how slowly it advances.
So instead, I have been slow-counting to 420 ─ seven minutes is 420 seconds. I counted unduly slow one day and discovered that I had already surpassed 7½ minutes by a considerable degree, so I held out until I got past the eight-minute mark.
A second time a couple or so days later I also exceeded 7½ minutes and decided to hold out for the eight minutes.
And it was soon after that when I decided to just forget bothering with 7½ minutes and advancing right to an eight-minute target.
But it is not easy. I do not deserve to be planking for eight minutes on a regular basis ─ my planking fitness is not that advanced. I endure from sheer mental resolve.
I only wish to speak of two further things ─ both involve shows my brother and I have watched recently, thanks to our Android TV Box.
I believe that it was Thursday morning that I tuned in the 2007 movie Atonement. I suppose that I would recommend it to some degree ─ I might give it a three out of a possible five-star rating; for it had theatrical / production elements that I did not care for.
Then I believe that it was Friday evening that my brother and I watched the final episode of the series Beyond. I had no idea that we would be watching a series finale that resolved nothing and was in fact a cliffhanger for a never-coming third season.
This was an enormous disservice to fans of the series.
I have no idea why Wikipedia declares that character Willa was a cyborg ("a mysterious cyborg named Willa") ─ if she was, I am sure that Beyond.Fandom.com's profile of Willa Frost would have mentioned this incredible nugget.
And this is where I am calling a halt for this post. Quite coincidentally, my wife has just arrived home (she has not been here since Friday morning ─ such is my marriage).
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