While watching T.V. last evening and having some supper of leftovers all by myself in the darkened living room, shortly after 8:00 p.m. my eldest stepson intruded to ask if I wanted to go out for supper ─ he said that it would be to a sushi restaurant.
I of course declined, making a grand show of the fact that I was already eating my supper. I wasn't quite sure just why he was making the offer.
Then around 8:20 p.m., my younger brother showed up from whatever bar he had been drinking at, and I was not in the least encouraged by his state. I don't like trying to watch episodes of the series we follow when he is plastered because he is incapable of following anything that requires thought, and far too often starts to pass out.
This forces me to rewatch the episode with him a following morning when he is sober.
So I decided to tune in a series I watch on my own just to see if he would be able to hold onto consciousness.
Meantime, my wife showed up ─ she had worked earlier at her friend's Thai restaurant, but she does not usually come home on Fridays. Instead, she will usually go directly in to Vancouver from work to wherever it is that she spends her weekends, for such is my marriage.
I was to figure out that she and her two sons were all going out together for that sushi meal ─ probably because the younger lad is due to leave on Sunday on a flight to his birth country of Thailand for a vacation of a month or so.
My wife knows that I need to be forewarned well in advance ─ preferably the day before ─ if I am to prepare myself for going anywhere to eat (or to go anywhere at all for almost anything else).
Upon their departure, my brother's drunken questioning and aggravating musings were making me angrier and angrier. He becomes almost malevolent in his imperious drunkenness.
However, he held onto his consciousness, and we were still watching T.V. when the diners eventually returned. And anon, my wife retreated upstairs and evidently went to bed.
She has been known to take a nap on Friday evenings if she is home, for she parties a lot and becomes rundown. But her naps have always been taken in the early evening or even the late afternoon.
Was she possibly intending to spend the night, I wondered?
I finally risked tuning in an episode of one of the T.V. series that my bother and I both follow. It was well past 10:00 p.m., and I figured to wait until 10:30 p.m. and then fetch a can of the strong (8% alcohol) beer that I try to keep in stock.
It was not to be. Not much more than five minutes into the show, I noticed that my brother was sitting with her eyes tightly closed. And so quite fed up with him, I turned off the T9 Android 8.1 TV Box I had been operating to watch T.V. with, and I left my brother with basic cable on the T.V.
I came upstairs here to my computer, and awaited the availability of the bathroom ─ one of my wife's two sons was in it, and I needed to use it before getting to bed.
It took some while, and when at last I got to bed, it was 11:00 p.m.
I had some worries ─ mostly financial ─ eating at me, but I tried to allow myself to embrace the presence of my wife and find some comfort just in her being there. I had no idea if she was asleep or not.
After about 10 minutes, she seemed to have received a text that she had to read. Then after turning on the bedside lamp, she rose and went to the bathroom. I was wearing a blindfold all this while.
Soon, her cellphone alarm began to sound ─ she had left the phone in our bedroom. It blasted off maybe six or more alarms, and then with urgency she bustled into the bedroom to turn it off.
I soon realized that she was dressing, and it sounded like she was even putting on a coat.
Then she turned off the lamp, exited the bedroom, and closed the door.
And I have heard nothing from her since as I type these words late Saturday afternoon.
It cut me to the quick that she would abandon me like that last night without a word ─ can her partying and her friends be so damned important?
I also felt excruciatingly alone, for I have no friends anywhere near, and my brother becomes a (usually miserable) drunkard every day of his life. He and I have nothing but blood in common.
I have no one to talk with ─ no one to share woes with. I only have my two blogs into which to voice some of my travails. And last night, I even despised God for his abandonment of me.
The totality of the futility that I felt was overwhelming, and my tears did flow. I cannot even choose to die because I have far too many obligations ─ I am trapped in a life I no longer desire.
I do believe that my brother probably eventually went to bed and got to sleep before I found any.
I think that it may have been around 4:00 a.m. that I decided to get up and put work into the post that I am developing at one of my six hosted websites.
Due to some initial complications with the content I was accessing, I only ever managed to accomplish about half of what I had hoped to do. Yet, it was at least 8:00 a.m. before I was back in bed seeking some further sleep.
And I remained abed until possibly as late as 10:40 a.m. By then, my brother had been up for some while and was reading the Saturday morning edition of the Vancouver Sun that I subscribe to.
I have felt better than I did last night after my wife rose from our bed and soon enough abandoned me. Even when I rose around 4:00 a.m., I was feeling stronger and closer to my normal.
My brother will probably not be home this evening, for his usual weekly routine is to spend Saturday evening with his girlfriend Bev at the bar that she works at, and then he will go home with her and spend the night there. I think that Sunday may be her only usual day off work.
If he remains away, I will do my best to get to bed very early.
Before I returned to bed early this morning, I located a couple of videos that were posted to my wife's Facebook account quite late Thursday evening ─ one was posted at 10:42 p.m., and the other at 10:53 p.m.
She is with two of her friends, both of whom own Thai restaurants. My wife presently works for one of her friends ─ the one who was operating what was likely my wife's cellphone's camera.
I downloaded the two videos, and then this afternoon I used a free online service and spliced them together, since one video was merely a continuation of the other in which my wife is giving a farcical cooking demonstration.
I think that she is preparing a version of som tam or maybe a spicy noodles dish.
The three ladies are clearly drinking ─ and quite drunk. The conversation is an entertaining mix of English and Thai.
I actually find the video almost delightfully amusing, for my wife can be quite the clown. The video is over eight minutes in duration, if you wish to give it a go:
I titled the video "Thai Cooking Demonstration", but it easily could have been titled "Cooking With Alcohol".
I recognized the kitchen as being at the home of my wife's employer ─ the woman operating the cellphone camera.
Unfortunately, as much as I would have liked to have made the video at YouTube available for public viewing, I instead set the video to be unlisted. It was just a little too apparent that the ladies were drunk, so I preferred not to openly showcase them in that condition.
Well, son of a gun! As I have been typing this shortly after 5:30 p.m., my wife has shown up!
She appears to intend to be home for awhile, so I am going to stop this post here and get it published.
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