I confess considerable surprise to have checked my AdSense account for today and found that I have been credited with 14¢. This is the first accrual of anything at all since (supposedly) sometime in October when I was credited with 5¢.
I had honestly believed that my last gain of any pennies was months ago ─ consequently, that it was actually just back in October seems too recent to believe. But I suppose that it must be so.
This is admittedly a rather nice discovery as 2020 draws to a close. However, please allow me to place this into harsher perspective.
After this 14¢ accrual, my AdSense balance ought to total out at $54.20. But Google only pays out a balance once it breaks into a $100 total.
And so I am a very little more than halfway to a payout.
Now here is where that harsh perspective comes in. My last payout was for $101.23 ... but that was back on October 21, 2016.
In other words, just over four years ago. So ... is it going to take me about another four years to break into that $100 payout threshold?
Please keep in mind that I am 71 years old. In four years, I'll be 75 years old, if I am still alive.
Google is not exactly providing me with any kind of living income! And even if I do make it to that next payout, will I then be faced with waiting yet another eight years to again achieve that $100 threshold? I would be 81 years old, if that's the case.
This is ridiculous.
But on to other matters.
I managed to get through yesterday without a taste of alcohol. As I wrote in yesterday's post, if I had not been dedicated to creating an entry in this blog that day, I would have instead tuned in a Christmas movie and had some drinks.
The Christmas / New Year's period generally finds me in a heightened state of anxiety due to some alcohol (and also social) withdrawal. I tend to feel especially lonely, and my life especially void.
An emotional Christmas movie and the drinks to encourage that emotion are oddly cathartic, and I usually enter into a weepy state. But at least by then I am not keenly sober and painfully conscious of my loneliness.
Drinking also numbs me. Fortunately, however, yesterday I was not beset with those profound pangs of yearning to dull that pain. I found myself feeling distinctly normal.
Nevertheless, that said, I would definitely have been drinking if I had the time to have watched a Christmas movie instead of busying myself with a post here. I definitely wanted to see a Christmas movie and have some drinks.
And that is where I find myself today. I do not feel particularly lonely nor craving of a numbing drink, but I do intend to tune in a Christmas movie late this afternoon once it becomes dark. And I will have some drinks.
I am composing this post early toward that end, for it is only 1:36 p.m. as I type these words. My younger brother is still within his bedroom resting up for his daily afternoon away ─ a wet weather day, incidentally. And since I expect that he will be busing, the likelihood of him arriving back home by 9 p.m. are remote. Which is to say, I am going to have lots of time for a movie.
I got to bed early last evening. I was upstairs here when I heard my brother arrive home ─ what I heard was him hauling out the two wheelie bins to street side for today's emptying.
So rather than become involved with him, I just went to bed. In fact, I was in bed at exactly 8:30 p.m.
I was actually able to acquire a few blocks of decent sleep over the evening as I awaited the arrival of the midnight hour when he usually retires to his bedroom for the night. I would then rise and come here to my computer to get some work done.
I think that I may have checked the time around 10 p.m. after one decent block of sleep; and then again at 11:01 p.m. after another. I may even have slipped into a bit of a nap after that, for it was early into the midnight hour when next I checked.
But my brother was still downstairs lounged in front of the T.V. Unfortunately, he was unconscious.
I had yet to brush my teeth ─ a process that can take as much as 20 minutes, for it involves the use of coconut oil and I usually spend a few minutes swishing the oil around in my mouth before expectorating it.
So I involved myself in that as I lay atop my bed.
He was still unconscious in his recliner when I finished, so I simply came here to my computer that is kept in a small room immediately next to my bedroom, and I pulled the door nearly closed.
I figured that when he finally came upstairs, he would see my bedroom door closed (which it was), and probably believe that my wife must have come home ─ she spends much of her evenings shut up in this room with the door mostly closed when she his home. She watches movies on a tablet, and does whatever else ─ she is active on Facebook, for one thing.
Anyway, I expected that he would probably just think that she was home and that he had failed to remember that fact, thereby thinking nothing of it.
And so it apparently was. He passed right by the mostly closed door without question.
I put some work into adding content into a post I have in progress at one of my two last hosted websites (I used to have six of them), but the urge was there to instead just go downstairs and watch a Christmas movie and have those drinks.
The urge did eventually pass, but I became possessed of a rather foul mood ─ it would have been better to have watched the movie. My mood became so embittered or negative that I didn't even much care that I had a Christmas music station playing on my computer ─ I had found it helpful to tune it in the night before. As I implied earlier, I have a terrible time of society so abruptly relinquishing everything relating to Christmas.
I had been listening to a U.S. radio station that began playing Christmas music late in October; and then one of our local radio stations started doing so on November 12. So that had been my musical diet ever since ─ it was all part of an unusually long buildup toward the big day.
Having that immersion for over two months makes it too hard on me to just suddenly let it all go ─ I need to taper off, and not drop it all 'cold turkey'.
I took a considerable break and now my afternoon is nigh done. One of the things I needed to take care of was a scheduled exercising session out in the cold backyard toolshed. That is one thing to my credit over these holidays ─ I may not be exercising quite as fully as I might otherwise have done on any particular day, but I have not yet forsaken an entire day.
I am keeping myself physically challenged.
But I would still like to try and perform 201 of my version of Hindu squats, and also have a bath. I have just had an evidently badly needed nap, so I am working my way through a cup of hot instant coffee ─ unsweetened, but well creamed.
And now I hear my wife home! Well, maybe I am not going to get done that which I had hoped ─ maybe not even the movie. But we shall see.
I would like to mention that during the latter morning, I tuned in ─ via our Android TV Box and one of the browser 'apps' that I have downloaded into it ─ a Dr. Joseph Mercola interview that my brother and I watched on T.V. at BitChute.com: Media Bias and Journalism Censorship- Interview with Sharyl Attkisson.
The interview was an hour and eight minutes or so, and he watched it uncomplainingly.
I was already familiar with the lady, but he will not have ever heard of her.
Then when that rather interesting interview was done, I tuned in a nine-minute video on the same platform: With the risk of being censored, we make this public...
It seemed a dramatic condensation of a far longer production, so I can't securely explain the video. There seemed to be three or four different people in communication with one another as if in a teleconference, and who were sounding alarm over matters such as the eradication of (monetary) currency ─ part of the agenda being enacted upon the world by wealthy entities united against the rest of us in their "Great Reset" master plan.
I feel that it is essential for us to keep this threat foremost in our thinking, for many of us do not as yet have our lives ruined, and so we carry on lulled ─ and just because things seem to have a working sort of normalcy, the threat is meantime growing and it will ultimately descend heavily upon us, too. It will be too late to do anything to fend it off.
Anyway, I must close this post. I can still tackle those squats ─ it was not my wife whom I had heard after all. It was some young thing who must have driven home my youngest stepson (the 23-year-old) from work. She is still here 20 minutes later ─ I can hear them talking quite quietly downstairs.
Will she turn out to be his new girlfriend?
A package arrived today for him while he was away. It would seem that one of the things the large box contained was an external hard drive ─ specifically, a Seagate 1tb (tetrabyte) Backup Plus Slim
A few days ago, we had been in discussion about just such devices after he had suspiciously (a day or two prior to Christmas) enquired of me if there was an computer accessory I would not mind acquiring.
The two of us do not just engage one another in idle chatter, so I suspected that he had a Christmas gift in mind.
I have indeed been contemplating the wisdom of embracing the expense for an external hard drive because my computer is quite old now, and there are files and even some software on it that I would hate to suddenly lose forever. But on my limited pension income, I have never dared that expenditure.
I did not realize that prices have come down as much as they have since a few years ago when I first began having concerns about my computer dying.
He left the small external hard drive with me so that he could go back downstairs to his guest, but he said that he would research just how to get this thing set up. And now she has left ─ she was here at least a half hour.
I had always thought that these devices were large ─ maybe as large as a laptop, but of course far thicker. Probably by several inches. It was only during our discussion of a few days ago that he educated me on how small these things really are, for he presented one that he owned and used.
And now I have one.
Bless the lad. I get furious 'behind the scenes' (i.e., within) at him on a regular basis, but he really is a decent young man, as is his older brother. I love the both of them.
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