I had no time available yesterday for a post here. However, there was no improvement in terms of my personal immediate economics ─ my wife did not seek to compensate me for the full brunt I took in meeting the shortfall our chequing account was in with the monthly mortgage due to be debited from it on the 21st.
I had gone to bed early the evening of the 21st ─ it wasn't even 9 p.m. In fact, it may have been as early as 8:45 p.m.
My younger brother had just arrived home around 8:38 p.m.; and as I have made clear often enough of late in this blog, I have an unspoken deadline for him of 8:30 p.m. Should he be later than that in making it home from wherever he has been drinking, then I will not become involved with him for an evening of television (I am the only one of us able to operate our Android TV Box).
Confessedly, I did briefly reconsider. After all, he was only eight or so minutes over his unspoken deadline.
But then, why have a deadline if there is no enforcement associated with it?
So I held fast and took temptation or weakness out of the equation by smartly getting myself to bed.
It was not easy finding any sleep ─ it was so hot in the bedroom due to the day's sunshine. And I didn't even strip down. I lay fully clothed atop the bed with the ceiling fan running. As well, I had my eyes covered with a bandana blindfold, and over that I had a cotton hood pulled tight, for I was wearing a sleeveless cotton hoodie overtop a tee-shirt.
I was expecting that my wife was probably going to finally arrive home following her day's work at her friend's Thai restaurant, for she had not been home since late Friday morning.
She tends to spend her weekends somewhere in Vancouver (such is our sorry marriage).
Before I eventually managed to start drifting into any unconsciousness, there came a time when I was aware that my wife had come into the bedroom. She saw, of course, that I was sprawled out on the bed fully clothed, and evidently felt obliged to ask if I was okay after touching my arm to arouse my attention.
I merely spoke that I was ─ and that it was just too hot to be under the covers. At the time, I was prone, having assumed that posture in an effort to attain one that would be comfortable enough to help bring on sleep. I had already lain on my back and on both sides for varying periods of time without any success.
I supposed that my wife had come into the bedroom to probably fetch her housecoat, and that she would likely be sitting up for some while. She often cooks late in the evenings when she is home; and she will also have a meal with her two sons in their den area.
I had not stirred from where I was.
In time, I did indeed begin drifting into a succession of periods of unconsciousness. Then the point came where I was curious enough of the time to have a look ─ it was into the latter midnight hour. My brother should have by then retired to his bedroom for the night. It would be safe for me to rise and soon get to work adding content into the post I am constructing at one of my six hosted websites.
My computer is kept in a small room immediately adjacent to my bedroom. I anticipated that I would find my wife seated there, but the room was vacant. Also, the only lights on downstairs were in the boys' den area.
I could understand the living room light being off, but there should at least have been a light on in the kitchen where my wife would be spending much time.
So I came downstairs, quickly glimpsing that only my eldest stepson seemed to be visible in the boys' den area ─ his headphones were on, and he was staring at the screen of a laptop, quite apparently by himself.
I then checked outside; and sure enough, my wife's car was not here.
I could almost wonder if I had dreamed that she had come into the bedroom and enquired of me my state.
The only conclusion was that she must have had a party to attend, and had come for a change of clothes. Perhaps she would be home anew later on in the night.
Well, it was not to be so. I never returned to bed until around 4:30 a.m.
At best, I probably only managed to remain there for around four hours, and I was then back up and here at my computer. I cannot remember if I preceded my brother's emergence from his bedroom or not, but I often do. As much as he complains about being a poor sleeper, he certainly is no match for me in that area, I would venture.
I never join him until around 10:00 a.m. on weekday mornings ─ that is plenty early for me to be watching any T.V. And typically, we will only catch up on some of our shows until around 1 or 1:30 p.m., for he will by then make a return to his bedroom for some further bed rest ere he leaves for the afternoon to eventually get back into his drinking.
The day was another sunny one, so after he was to his bedroom, I changed into my gym-style shorts and was soon out on the backyard sundeck, my back exposed to the Sun for just over 40 minutes as I lay upon a pad.
I then came back into the house for my day's first meal.
I was probably eating that here at my computer when my brother once more emerged from his bedroom; and soon enough, he announced that he was taking his leave. I had heard him earlier arranging with two of his drinking buddies to rendezvous at a certain pub. Typically, my brother will bus to it, for he understands that he will be engaging considerable drinking and does not care to risk getting pinched again for being behind the wheel while 'under the influence'.
This for me betokened another early bedtime, for he would not likely be home until later into the evening.
I acquired some further sunning ─ just over half an hour for my front this time.
My wife was to arrive back home late in the afternoon. I didn't bring up the mortgage sacrifice I had made that left me broke until sometime next week when my monthly pension shows up ─ I figured that there would be time for her to perhaps broach the topic.
Then perhaps around 8:00 p.m. as I was watching some T.V., I was surprised by her when she made a quick goodbye as she hustled out the front door, clearly headed away for some sort of social entanglement.
Such is my life.
After I later went to bed, I had the usual lengthy delay in any onset of sleep. And when some sleep did come, it always seemed superficial and inadequate.
I became aware eventually that my wife was back home.
Then around 1:30 a.m. after finding myself curious on the time, I rose to put work once again into the website post I have under construction. In emerging from the bedroom, I was not much off from coinciding with my wife as she came upstairs, bound for our bedroom and her own retirement.
She is accustomed to my sleeping patterns, and merely acknowledged what was going on with me by quizzically commenting, "Up?"
And so it was with me, until shortly after 4:00 a.m.
She never had to work today, so she has been home the entire time. I felt that I had to force the time to put in this post, for I don't like missing two consecutive days. Facilitating this choice is the fact that the day has been primarily overcast, so I have not felt obligated to do any sunning.
And since today's scheduled exercise session was one in which I would have to work out in the bedroom, that has had to be abandoned ─ and thus, more blogging time made available.
I did need to have an early afternoon nap, following my younger brother's lead when he and I finished our late morning television-viewing. My wife was up by then, so the bedroom was available.
My brother was gone for the afternoon when I emerged from my bedroom upon acquiring that bit of needed sleep.
No talk was ever made of the mortgage, so I must accept that no recompense is going to willingly be offered; and I will not deign to beg for any.
Thus, my weekend will be shopping-free. I will have to force myself to get out early on both Saturday and Sunday mornings ere the break of day to benefit from the exercise of a good, long walk, and not be out for any other purpose.
I'm unsure if I will find the motivation to do so on both early mornings. At least with a destination to perform some grocery shopping, I have justification and purpose. To force myself away simply for the purpose of walking a number of miles is not a simple matter for me anymore.
It is after 7 p.m. right now ─ I need to have myself a bath while I can still find the facilities available. And if my brother is not home by 8:30 p.m., I will have myself an early evening despite my wife's presence.
What a life.
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