Although I did get to bed last evening right around 9 p.m. as a result of my younger brother arriving at that time from wherever he had been drinking, sleep had no intention of visiting me. I really cannot consider my wife to have any blame, for even though she was home, she knew I had gone to bed and did not thereafter intrude into the bedroom.
Whatever the cause, at 10 p.m. I was as fully awake as when first I went to bed. I had been reflecting upon the primary reason for my early bedtimes, and I had concluded that it had been due to my six hosted websites. I had been deeming that rising overnight to spend four or so hours working upon whatever was the latest post I had in the works, was crucial to completing any such post. Otherwise, my day was unlikely to present the opportunity.
However, as yesterday's post amply explained, I had been pushed into forsaking my websites. Five of the websites were hosted on one account at HostGator, and they had put them offline, claiming overuse of their resources.
If they had thought that doing this would goad me into purchasing a subscription for an expensive dedicated server instead of my 'baby' account on a shared server, they were to discover that I was done with any further threats from my webhosts.
After brief rumination, I embraced this as an opportunity to finally be free of the enslavement I have been under to my six hosted websites. I went into my HostGator account and deleted my credit card details, and then I responded to their E-mail by declaring that I was myself shutting down ─ I was done with hosted websites.
I had wisely been paying for my hosting on a monthly basis, so doing this cost me nothing ─ I was not sacrificing some prepaid subscription for which I would not receive any refund.
Again, you will have to refer to yesterday's post to see the two communications that I had received from them ─ but this arrived overnight at 3:17 a.m.:
Hello,
My name is Jesus and I am the Web Advisor II who received your escalation. I am following up with you regarding your last reply.
I would like to personally apologize for any inconvenience during the process and can assure you that we do not actively suspend or disable accounts. Only if found necessary to maintain server stability action will be taken to mitigate any accounts found over using CPU resources. In this case your account was found over using CPU and needed to be addressed to prevent the negative effects it was having on other users sharing the environment.
To provide some further context on the situation, HostGator allows a maximum of 25% CPU usage limit. You may exceed this limit for no longer than 90 seconds. This limit is for the entire account and is shared by all sites installed on the same cPanel. In your case this account was found over using CPU, at about 70% of the server's resources for a passing hour.
Unfortunately, there is no way of predicting an account's resource usage in advance. A sudden increase in traffic, a bot crawl, or a change in site activity can cause a site to dramatically increase its resource usage in an instant. When this happens, the server's ability to function properly is jeopardized, and we must, by necessity, restrict the source of the problem to keep the server functioning. The ultimate solution is to maintain the content hosted and keep it updated/optimized. More on optimizations can be read at https://www.hostgator.com/blog/7-ways-to-speed-up-your-website/
If you feel there is anything we can do to further address the matter for you we urge you to contact our live support staff and request a feedback escalation to have your situation reviewed by our management.
As always, Feel free to contact our Live Support at your convenience, we are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week if you have any further questions.
Here are our numbers:
Toll Free: 1-866-964-2867
International: 001-713-574-5287
Support & Live Chat:
- https://chat.hostgator.com/
- http://support.hostgator.com/
To this, I replied as follows at 5:47 a.m.:
I appreciate this extended explanation, Jesús.
I admit that it was a blow to receive the initial E-mail announcing the shutdown of my five websites on the account, especially since I had worked for over a month on just one post at AmatsuOkiya.com that I finally published several days ago that had a word-count supposedly exceeding 53,000 ─ it was by far the longest post I ever made, and probably consumed at least 120 hours of my life.
But the two options presented to keep the baby account alive and the five websites online are beyond my means and ability.
I definitely cannot afford a dedicated server, and I do not for an instant believe that I can control outside attempts to visit my websites that would limit such visits to legitimate humans alone. I already have Wordfence supposedly doing their best to provide those kinds of blocks.
The realization that my websites were offline was still very raw when I made the nearly snap decision to just give it all up after better than a decade. As I said in my first response, I have only been a failure all those years anyway, and with my 71st birthday looming a mere dozen days away, I'm tired of struggling.
Heck, too often I just feel tired of being alive. There's too much in my life already that I can't seem to deal with.
Anyway, once I made that snap decision to give up on the websites, I felt peculiarly at peace for it. There was no angst ─ just calm resignation. In fact, I have a sixth website that is hosted with JustHost which I also lease on a month-by-month basis, and I decided that even though it has also been online for at least a decade, I'm letting it go too. October 3 will be its last day.
A clean sweep.
I'm done ─ wiped out, Jesús. It's time to 'put up the gloves'. I don't belong in the website game anymore.
So I guess that's it!
Again, thanks for the attempt to reach out.
There has been no further communication from them. And yes, it is true what I expressed concerning my sixth and final website still online with JustHost ─ JustHost can thank HostGator for the loss of that account.
The website was a money pit anyway. Google had banned it from qualifying for AdSense, and it never managed to have any success whatsoever with any of the other affiliate income possibilities I was into over its decade-long lifetime.
So why keep on with it? I might as well be done with it all.
Anyway, after concluding last evening that my primary reason all along for getting to bed early was so that I could work on my websites overnight, I saw no need to just lay there awaiting my brother's eventual retirement for the night around midnight or later.
And so I rose.
I had some interaction with my wife, who was here in the small room next to our bedroom where I keep my computer. When she understood that I was going to remain up, she actually seemed encouraging about me going downstairs to be with my brother where he sat in the darkened living room by himself, drinking alone and watching T.V.
I suppose that she felt a little sorry for him.
When I did join him, I have to admit that he actually seemed 'pumped' to have my company. And he was to prove very good company himself, despite his drinking.
We were to watch T.V. until well into the midnight hour, and I was not back to bed until a little after 12:30 a.m. My brother had actually retired a little before I did.
My wife, though, remained up for some while longer.
After I eventually did fall into some sleep, by 4:30 a.m. I found myself too awake again to easily sink back into any more, so I rose and came here to my computer. Even though I was no longer bound to be toiling at one of my six hosted websites, I still had other things I could do ─ such as create a post at my private blog. Doing so would free up my day, for my blog posts can take quite some time on their own.
(Incidentally, feel free to request access. The blog is just over a dozen years old, and since early last year primarily focusses upon my old journal entries ─ I commenced that old journal sometime in 1973, I believe, when I was 23 years old; and at this stage in my private blog, I am transcribing and discussing the entries that I wrote exactly 40 years ago when I was 30 years old.)
In fact, between my two free Blogger / Blogspot blogs and my websites, I was easily spending a minimum of eight hours a day working on them, and sometimes as many as a dozen hours. So getting that private blog post out of the way for today was a boon.
I was not to make my return to bed until at least 6:45 a.m. Nevertheless, I can see how I will have some nights where I will be able to retire early in the evening and actually sleep (unlike last evening), thereby allowing me to rise during or soon after the midnight hour. On those occasions, I should be able to find the time to get out for at least a small walk of maybe a couple or so miles. As it is now, I only walk on the weekends, and lately I have only been doing so on early Sundays.
An exclusive Sunday walk is of minimal benefit ─ I need to do more. But I cannot get out during the daytime ─ especially during the workweek ─ because my environs present naught but stress: busy streets and buildings for miles around, and of course people everywhere. There is no peace or serenity out there for me.
Yes, I am reclusive by nature, but I am not a misanthrope. I do love my fellow man...but I seem best able to do so from afar. As it is, I am surrounded by overdevelopment; and since I do not drive, and I am too deep in debt to be able to flee here, I remain holed up in my heavily mortgaged home under self-imposed house arrest.
I have been in self-isolation for most of my adult life, and especially so since my retirement in earliest April 2011.
Anyway, upon returning to bed just ahead of dawn this morning, I managed a little further sleep, and then rose around 9:30 a.m. And at 10 a.m., I joined my brother downstairs for some T.V. ─ I operate our Android TV Box.
I had a documentary in mind ─ we had watched Plandemic last week, so I wanted us to now watch Plandemic: Indoctornation this time. Happily, my brother did not demur, and he seemed quite interested in the feature as it played out.
The only sure online source for these two productions seems to be at BitChute.com, so please go there to find them if you care to see them for yourself. We were able to watch them on T.V. because I have a couple of browser 'apps' downloaded into our Android TV Box. They are slow as the dickens, but at least they afford access to websites like this and make it possible to play features on T.V. instead of a computer screen.
What I very much enjoyed in the documentary this morning was how it addressed all of the negative noise that the first documentary inspired.
My brother and I were also to watch the finish of the second season of Channel Zero. Each season is an entirely different storyline. This time, the story was "No-End House".
I would give it better marks than the first season, but it left much unanswered.
And I have just now discovered that one of the main characters was played by actress Amy Forsyth. I did not know until now that I knew her from the T.V. series The Path where she had a bit of a recurring role as teen character Hawk's first girlfriend, and who was outside of the Meyer cult.
I also realize now where I recognized the actor playing a young character in American Horror Story's season storyline "Apocalypse" from. My brother and I both recognized the actor, but could not place where we knew him from. Actor Kyle Allen had played main character Hawk in The Path.
I will have to try and remember to inform my brother on both counts tomorrow morning when he is sober. If he arrives home by 8:30 p.m. this evening and I sit up with him to watch some of our shows via our Android TV Box, I won't bother trying to tell him anything of this nature then ─ it won't matter to him, and he won't remember it.
It is already after 7:30 p.m., so I must bring this post to a close. However, first I want to compliment the weather ─ it was another flawlessly sunny day. And just as I did yesterday afternoon, I sat out in the backyard and sunned my front for just over an hour as I lounged in a lawn- or deckchair and faced into the Sun.
This time, I only wore cutoffs throughout, for it was so very warm. I started the session at 1:42 p.m. well after my brother had gone to his bedroom to rest up before taking off for the afternoon to ultimately resume his drinking somewhere. He was gone when I came back into the house after my sunning.
My wife apparently got into my strong beer (8% alcohol) last night and drank two cans, as well as a regular-strength beer. She confessed to having paid a toll for it ─ my two cans of beer would be akin to drinking three cans of regular beer. Thus, she in effect drank four cans of beer with at least a 5% alcohol content.
She had to work this latter afternoon at her friend's Thai restaurant, so I saw her off. She said she wouldn't be back until tomorrow (such is our sorry marriage), so I definitely will not have her presence as a possible deterrent to me finding easy sleep if I do get to bed early this evening. It will all depend upon whether my brother is home by 8:30 p.m. at very latest.
By the way, I never did speak with her about my VISA credit card ─ but you will have to refer to yesterday's post to learn what that portended.
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