My wife never went to work yesterday, so I had no opportunity to blog here.
She had gotten home well after I had retired for the evening on Monday, March 16. I now forget just when it was that I rose very early in the a.m. yesterday to work on the website post that I am developing, but I seem to believe that it may have been late into the midnight hour.
My wife was still up, but she soon enough announced that she was going to bed.
I performed the work I wanted to add into the post for that time, and then returned to bed three or four hours after having risen.
Then I was up once more well ahead of 9:00 a.m.
For several days, I have been experiencing the feeblest of what I suspect must be a cold virus. My nose is just slightly runny, and I am producing more nasal mucous than normal that manifests itself post-nasally, requiring occasional hacking and snorting to clear away.
Otherwise, I feel absolutely normal in every other way.
Well, it seems that upon returning to bed and eventually getting to sleep after my work on that website post, my wife says that I began snoring ─ and according to her, I did so for about an hour, preventing all possibililty of sleep for her.
Just when she was about to give up by getting out of bed, I mysteriously stopped.
I never learned of this until after my wife rose yesterday ─ probably around mid-afternoon, if not even later.
At that point, I was taking advantage of my younger brother's absence for the afternoon, and had attempted to find a nap by lying on his bed with a heavy blanket that I brought to cover myself with.
When I became aware that my wife was finally up, I rose. She had gone downstairs...but suddenly my cellphone began ringing.
It was her.
I called out that I was home.
Well, she was all afire that we needed to suddenly go grocery shopping on the weight of my VISA card because we had no money to do it with.
My VISA card already has a balance of credit debt well exceeding $4,000 that is due to her gambling irresponsibility. We have something like $630 in our chequing account, but our $1,600 monthly mortgage usually gets debited on the 22nd of each month, unless that date falls on a weekend (which it does this month, so the debit likely won't happen until the Monday thereafter).
The reason we only have $630 right now is because my wife withdrew $900 a week or more ago and gambled it away. And that money was my monthly pension ─ she had not deposited anything of her restaurant earnings. I suspect that she likely gambled away her paycheque first.
So now she suddenly expected me to dive even deeper into credit debt, and even talked of using my credit card to get the missing money for the mortgage.
You can only begin to sense the anguish this discussion caused in me. And meantime, I am supposed to keep from her two sons this recent gambling debacle of hers, and so I am unable to bring them into the picture.
But they are most likely going to have to learn the truth by the weekend. Both of them have jobs that may not pay very well, but I refuse to take on further credit debt to cover the missing mortgage money.
My wife and I did not go shopping. That venture collapsed when I asked her if she remembered what the card's four-digit passcode was, for I did not know it. I can use the card online, but not for any in-person shopping.
I never used to know what my four-digit passcode was, but she pressured me into getting a new one when her gambling was resulting in the borrowing of money from friends who began wanting repayment.
She wanted to use my card to withdraw $5,000 cash to calm them down. Meantime, I told her to hold off and I first liquidated $5,000 of my shrinking RRSP ($500 was taken off the top for income tax, so I only received $4,500).
We covered the mortgage for that month, and I expect that she ameliorated whatever urgency she was experiencing from any friends.
But while she had my credit card, back to the casino she went ─ and that is why I now have over $4,000 in credit debt on it. I had the balance nearly paid off.
And now yesterday, she wanted to rack up more?
I am a 70-year-old pensioner with no other income but my pension. My wife robs me by withdrawing $900 of it, and then expects me to go even deeper into debt through further credit?
She did calm down last afternoon after accepting that she had lost track of that passcode for my card. Now, I think that it may be one of four different four-digit codes that come to my mind, but I am hardly going to stand in some supermarket trying to buy groceries with it while I have to keep attempting passcodes until I hit the correct one.
She got her youngest stepson to go off in her car to do some shopping, and she prepared a nice supper for the household. Then around 7:30 p.m. while I was having a bath after she had taken a shower, she took off for the evening and night without a word of explanation to me.
She normally spends her weekends somewhere in Vancouver, and only sleeps here when she has to work because our home is so much closer to the restaurant that employs her (such is my sorry marriage).
But a couple or so weeks ago, she had to become part-time at the restaurant because of serious trouble one of her arms was experiencing from all of the constant kitchen work. She applied for Employment Insurance sick benefits to help make up for the income slack, but so far no money has yet come from that source.
She may now be working even less due to the damned COVID-19 panic ─ the restaurant is only letting in customers who have made reservations. It is likely a means of trying to control the number of people who might be in it at any one time, since the provincial government has mandated that gatherings of 50 people or more are now effectively banned.
The restaurant also provides for take-out orders, and will also deliver.
Anyway, after I went to bed last evening around 9:15 p.m. or so, I was awhile later to receive a text from my wife:
Hi we don't have to talk just want to let you know for a any spend government will cover all don't pay any bill yet ok
I can only presume that my wife suddenly became privy to measures the federal government is taking as described in this official public announced published today: Prime Minister announces more support for workers and businesses through Canada’s COVID-19 Economic Response Plan.
There is even talk in the announcement of providing some sort of mortgage relief that I do not quite fathom. This was one statement in that context:
...This support will include up to a six-month payment deferral for mortgages, and the opportunity for relief on other credit products.
I have no clear idea, either, of how her limited brain thinks we can escape or at least temporarily forfend payment of our various debts when none of it has anything to do with a coronavirus ─ we're where we are only because my wife will not stop partying and gambling.
I am damned well not going to the bank that is holding our mortgage and begging them to give us a deferral. This is my wife's mess.
I will wait until Friday afternoon and see if some unbelievable financial miracle presents itself. Then, failing that deliverance, I will let my wife know that I am going to tell her two sons why we need $1,000 to cover the mortgage.
If they can not or will not make up for her stupidity and refusal to stop gambling, then I will tell them what I intend to do ─ it is the only way I can ever be free of the massive debt I have allowed my wife to bring upon us.
I will tell them that I am going to make my my younger brother privy to everything, and offer him the full ownership of the house ─ he already owns half of it, but the house is in my name for purposes of two property tax grants that I qualify for (he only qualifies for one, and the difference is quite substantial).
Property taxes are due at the start of July, so I will offer him the entire house for $1, but he will have to get it sold within the year before the taxes come due in 2021. And he will have to have the house sold 'sight unseen', since the place is a mess and I have no intention of trying to spruce it up for any number of potential buyers who might want to come trekking through.
I will not ask him for anything ─ just that he use the sale to pay off the enormous credit debt I have let my wife put me into. In truth, maybe $250,000 would eradicate everything. If my brother would cover that, he could have whatever else the sale of the house brought.
Then we all would go our separate ways. As far as I am concerned, my marriage is a farce. And I can't live with my brother who needs to get miserably drunk every damned day of the year.
I would turn my back on all that I own ─ my computers, everything. I would end my online presence, and go away somewhere to end my days all alone.
Alone is how I feel I am anyway ─ it might as well be physically true as well.
Alone is how I feel I am anyway ─ it might as well be physically true as well.
So, everything is up to my two stepsons and their mother come late Friday. I will let her know first that very afternoon that I intend to tell the lads that they have to produce $1,000 to cover the mortgage shortfall that she is responsible for by Monday; or else I will be asking my brother to do it, and also tell him that I will turn full ownership of the house over to him for the nominal amount of $1 come July.
Perhaps I should not have bothered posting today.
I will finish with a two-image collage or commemoration that Google Photos created yesterday:
This Google Photos commemoration was created from two photos that I apparently took on March 17, 2014 of the eradication of a stretch of tall evergreen shrubbery that lined that stretch of alleyway that starts right alongside our property.
Our home is visible beyond that wooden fence in the top photo.
Supposedly the City of Surrey forced the shrubbery homeowner to have that stretch of magnificent shrubbery removed ─ perhaps because the tall wall of growth provided too much anonymity in that stretch of the alley, and for that reason certain social elements would take advantage of it to conduct improper activity.
With the huge wall of shrubbery gone, the alley was then far more exposed to view.
Our home is visible beyond that wooden fence in the top photo.
Supposedly the City of Surrey forced the shrubbery homeowner to have that stretch of magnificent shrubbery removed ─ perhaps because the tall wall of growth provided too much anonymity in that stretch of the alley, and for that reason certain social elements would take advantage of it to conduct improper activity.
With the huge wall of shrubbery gone, the alley was then far more exposed to view.
Anyway, here are the two original photos:
The shrubbery had grown to at least twice the height of those workers, and it was practically impenetrable ─ especially since there was also a wire fence all along immediately behind and overgrown by the shrubbery.
This is what the wall of shrubbery looked like back on July 18, 2013 ─ I took the following photo of my wife as she walked down that alleyway. The luxuriant greenery at her left were the plants that were to be removed:
The demolition of those plants was just another sad event in my recent life.
Enough blogging....
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