None are as low as I.
I cannot climb from the foul mire that firmly grips me; and all the while, God just ignores my pleas.
oooooooooooooo
I believe that I may have been to my bed last evening at 9:30 p.m. ... or was it 10 p.m.? Scant matter.
I was to remain abed, sleeping on and off, until nigh 3 a.m. before I finally rose to put some work into the new post I recently began at one of my six hosted websites. Ultimately, the plan was to get away early to do some grocery shopping.
My sole transportation are my feet, and my chosen destination this morning was a store approximately 1¼ miles away.
However, as the night gave way to day, my resolution faded dramatically. I hate being out in the public ─ it is beyond my ability to describe it.
As well, there was nothing I was in serious immediate need of, although some of the produce on hand here would not last me beyond mid-week at best.
I do not shop during the week anymore ─ I just cannot seem to brave the world on weekdays, so all I am left are the weekends.
Unfortunately, for most of my life ─ since perhaps my early teens ─ I have accepted the legitimacy of the claims of the Seventh-day Sabbatarianists. And so ─ despite not having attended a regular church service since sometime in the first half of 1964 (if my memory is true) ─ I feel flagrantly sinful engaging in commerce on the day that I came to accept is the true Sabbath.
My youthful church attendance involved two different denominations that were both Sunday Sabbatarianists ─ specifically the Baptists when I was a boy; and then the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in the approach of my adolescence.
Thus, I have never actually attended a Saturday church service in the entirety of my life. Yet I believe so firmly that I ought to be observing that day as "holy" ─ even if I only refrain from conducting commerce on that day ─ that it has become extremely difficult for me to do any shopping on Saturday.
I feel no compunction at all about shopping on Sunday, incidentally.
But doing all of my shopping on Sunday when I have no transportation beyond my own feet is too limiting ─ I can only attend but one store, and then I am done for the day. And usually, my preferred store in nigh six miles from my home.
Anytime I shop there, I am done for the day ─ the ordeal of hauling home my purchases completely depletes me. I am 70 years old, after all ─ not some young 50-year-old.
This morning around 6:30 a.m. I found myself on my way to the nearer market ─ i.e., the one maybe 1¼ miles from here.
However, the day was already bright, and the sky predominantly blue. There seemed to be considerable vehicular traffic on the streets, and fellow pedestrians were also out there.
I did not want to endure this public experience when I had no real pressing shopping need ─ it might well have been different if it was not Summer. If instead it was a gloomier month when it would still be fairly dark even after 7 a.m., then I might have found some favour with that comforting blanket of anonymity that the darkness extends.
I did not have that.
It might have even helped if the early morning had been overcast and perhaps also lightly raining.
But it was not. The morning was brilliantly bright. And I felt that it was no place for me.
I may have travelled as much as a quarter mile before what little determination existed within me evaporated entirely, and I turned myself about and headed for the refuge of home, free from the scrutiny of the world without.
In my defeat, I soon proceeded to plunge myself even deeper, wasting at least 1½ hours in what can only be termed as self-degradation when I could have instead been acquiring some further sleep to better rejuvenate my outlook and spirits.
I was to eventually return to my bed, but it was in my fullest defeat by then, and I think the time was well beyond 10 a.m. Even my younger brother had risen and was downstairs enjoying his coffee and reading the Saturday morning edition of the Vancouver Sun that I subscribe to.
When he first emerged from his bedroom and was passing by this small room where I keep my computer, he enquired if I had watched last evenings Canucks / Blues playoff game?
I had not; I had even forgotten to check online to see how we did, for the series was tied up with two games apiece in this 'best out of five' competition.
And the St. Louis Blues are last year's Stanley Cup champions ─ whereas the Canucks are the oldest NHL hockey team to have never won that trophy despite many decades (50 years) of trying. We have in fact only ever gotten to the finals three times.
So it was with some glee that my brother happily announced that we won the game last evening ─ and did so by a four-point margin (6 - 2). The Blues were gone.
I have since learned that we are the last remaining Canadian team in the playoffs, even though there is still another series of games to be played before it is decided which two teams vie for the Cup.
Now we face the Vegas Golden Knights ─ a fairly new team, for sure; but they are "top-seeded", whatever that signifies.
Can we possibly beat them and make it to the Stanley Cup game? It sure would be nice!
So would living to see Vancouver finally win the Cup. It's been a long wait, and I've come to think that I will be gone before it ever happens.
Anyway, tomorrow evening is apparently our first game against the Golden Knights.
It is now 1:37 p.m. and my brother just left a few minutes ago for the afternoon ─ maybe for the evening, if he happens to spend tonight at the home of his girlfriend Bev. But I can't bank on it.
I am going to take a break now and enjoy some backyard sunshine.
oooooooooooooo
I have to wrap this up fast because it's already after 8 p.m.
I put in over 40 minutes of afternoon sunning ─ but just my front. I started too late to have the time for my back.
I want to conclude with the following response I made to a YouTube video link that my older maternal half-sister forwarded to me today ─ the video is titled People Need to Take This Everywhere!!! Bill Gates & Fauci Wicked Agenda Exposed!!
This was my response after I watched a fair bit of it:
Sometimes I feel like I'm the only person who bothers trying to check things out.Okay, that's it for today. Man, I hope I have a happier day tomorrow.
I went to that video and saw that it had over 5,000 comments ─ and as far as I could tell, not one person voiced any questions about its validity.
So I just now made this comment ─ and I'm sure that my comment will be quickly pulled or deleted:
I started to get a little excited about this, even though I'm Canadian. Big changes like this would dramatically affect things here, too.
But when I looked for the link to any documentation proving the video's claims, there were no links nor even article or document titles ─ and why was the document blurred out in the video that the doctor kept flourishing?
And who is the doctor anyway? ─ I couldn't clearly catch his name. I tried to do a Google search for him and found that people have apparently been doing this long before because "dr scott prone marietta ga" and "dr scott promo marietta ga" were already commonplace, but had no results associated with them.
So I did a bit of research about the lawsuit that any of you can do for yourself ─ for instance, do a Google search for "del big tree and robert kennedy jr win lawsuit against u.s. government".
The only event like it occurred back in 2018 ─ not just in the past few days.
And what has it meant since 2018? Obviously, absolutely nothing.
So this is old news that never apparently went anywhere and is now being recycled as some brand new triumph ─ for some bizarre reason.
I hate this false sensationalism. I really hoped that things were about to get turned around.
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