It seemed to me as if I could have been awake for as much as two hours when my 6 a.m. cellphone alarm finally chimed. My sleeplessness initially was the result of the onset of excruciating financial worries.
As well, last night my wife had invited me to join her, her two sons, and the boys' girlfriends for a meal in the Guildford area scheduled for 6 p.m. on Friday (Boxing Day). I had decided that I would not include myself, for it is far outside of my pathetic routine. I was also not fussy about adding myself to someone's bill ─ whoever was organizing this and paying the tab.
I am uncomfortable socially, and being seated for however long a meal like this would involve was also unpalatable. It seemed to me to be more an affair for a mother and her two sons, and their girlfriends ─ not the outsider I feel myself to be.
But I was feeling guilt over my decision.
Anyway, I rose at 6 a.m. because I was planning on visiting a credit union ATM and a pharmacy, both about half a mile from here. The pharmacy opens at 8 a.m. normally, and I wanted to see about getting further lottery gift packs if they had them, among other things.
It would have been an ideal venture, for it was even raining. But it was also a workday, so commuters would be out there regardless. At least schoolkids are all on Christmas break, so none of those would have been extant.
As 8 a.m. became nigh, I was vacillating, even though I was all dressed to go.
And then my younger brother emerged from his bedroom, and that was all the excuse I required to call off the hobble.
It turned out that my brother was only up as early as he was because he intended to get out this morning on errands, explaining that he wanted to attend them this morning because he was going to have take Bev out in the early afternoon on her errands.
And so we only watched two videos together via our Android TV Box.
I led off with a 26-minute (26:48) video uploaded yesterday to YouTube's AnitaK channel: Why this interview with Pierre flopped...
Pierre Poilievre sits down for another interview that quickly turns into a familiar pattern — loaded questions, selective framing, and a clear lack of accountability for those actually in power.
This breakdown looks at how so-called “neutral” interviews become political weapons, and why Canadians are increasingly skeptical of MSM coverage of Conservative leaders.Watch closely — the tactics matter.
The second video was 48 minutes and had been published yesterday to BitChute's Progressive Truth Seekers channel: Russia, China CONDEMN Donald Trump - Venezuela Invasion For OIL.
I am not going to reproduce the disjointed video description ─ just go to the link to read it for yourself. The beautiful woman performing the interview is Rachel Blivens, and her guest was Mark Sleboda, neither of whom are familiar to me.
The video was sourced from this original YouTube video.
My brother's departure allowed me to have a fairly early light first meal of my day, and I was back to bed for my nap ahead of noon ─ he got back home around 11:30 a.m.
My wife apparently never had to work today. She was up by the time I finished napping.
I passed along my decision concerning Friday's outing for a 6 p.m. supper. It didn't break her heart, so I had no need for guilt. She even said that her oldest son had said not to force me to go if I was disinclined.
Having her home was to cost me $100, however. It never ends. But I was considering that sum anyway to help with paying the tab on that meal, if it was her idea for them all to get together (I still don't know).
My only exercise today has been the usual half dozen sets of pull-ups and chin-ups out in the backyard tool shed: two sets of pull-ups (3-1), two sets of chin-ups (2-2), and two sets of pull-ups between the thick bars of the playground ladder I am forced to use (1-1). I held a dead hang at the completion of the final pull-up for a 45-count before my hands had slipped too far off the top of the thick ladder bars.
My wife was not home to stay, leaving here shortly after 4:30 p.m. to go and visit her oldest son over in Burnaby where he lives with his girlfriend. She of course has other plans as well, and suggested that she might not be back before Friday.
I had been nurturing notions of maybe getting out this evening to visit the ATM and pharmacy, for the latter is open until 10 p.m. But this has been a bath day, so I first tackled that long chore. To my surprise when I emerged from the bathroom afterwards ─ possibly as early as 6:30 p.m. ─ I discovered my brother to already be home from his afternoon bus trip to do some social drinking.
Once again, his presence was sufficient to have me cancel my outing.
Actually, I have been wondering if I was going to get invited to join him and Bev downstairs so we could all watch Christmas movies like we used to do on Christmases when my brother would bring her here for a couple of days over that period. But here it is 7:23 p.m., and they seem content to watch their usual old reruns of M*A*S*H and whatever else seems to suit them.
Well, time is running out, for I am about to shut myself up here in my bedroom and start watching shows on my bedside computer ─ and doing some drinking.
I am going to break now and have a supper, then tune something in ─ I will return later this evening to finish.
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Shut up all alone here in my bedroom, I poured myself a glass tumbler of Mission Ridge Premium Red Wine (13% alcohol) ─ that would be a little more than eight ounces of the delicious stuff.
And I tuned in the 2019 Christmas movie Grounded for Christmas. My source was this GOOJARA.to link.
It was very enjoyable, but it never really started affecting me emotionally until very late into the feature. I stood here in my dark living room watching the several days of celebrations just ahead of Christmas going on in the Winter setting of the movie, the irony not lost upon me that I am here utterly alone drinking and watching a Christmas movie on Christmas Eve while my drunken brother and Bev watch their usual mundane garbage on my big screen T.V. that is off limits to me after midday now that she has been living here since late last February.
We don't even have on Christmas lights because I never saw to it ─ why? I am shut up in my tiny bedroom unable to see and enjoy them in the living room, and through the living room window enjoying them blinking away merrily around the open carport. I can see none of that here in my room, so why the Hell bother?
It is just another evening alone in my bedroom.
I suppose the movie may have ended around 9:40 p.m., at which time I opened my bedroom door while I tended to a few things here on my computer. My brother came upstairs once to use the toilet, but said nothing each time he passed by my bedroom door ─ he's apparently content ignoring Christmas Eve.
I cannot live another year like this. And me too 𝒻𝓊𝒸𝓀𝒾𝓃ℊ crippled to even walk anywhere far to do anything.
Right now it is 10:20 p.m. and I am going to tune in something non-Christmas or else I am going to be an emotional mess, for I want more drink.
By the way, the lead actress in the Christmas movie was unknown to me ─ Julianna Guill.
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It felt like a betrayal watching this sort of dramatic fluff, but I tuned in The Carrie Diaries ─ episode three ("Strings Attached") of season two. Nevertheless, the diversion succeeded, and I got rather caught up in the several storylines.
And it helps to have some very attractive ladies to drink in along with a can of Cariboo Malt (7.9% alcohol).
My source for the episode was another GOOJARA.to link.
I'm unsure when the show ended, but it may have been around 11:20 p.m. at most.
I think I am done for the evening ─ no further shows or drink. Tomorrow is Christmas, and reportedly the turkey brought out last night to thaw is over a year old! I hope my brother and Bev know what they're doing.
She asked me early this evening if I knew what my eldest stepson & girlfriend were doing for Christmas ─ if they would be coming here at all, and hopefully have some of the dinner my brother and she intend to prepare.
But I haven't the remotest idea. I suggested that we needed to try and broach the subject with the young brother who still lives here, but he is damned elusive. He probably managed to flee somewhere for the evening before anyone spoke to him.
Incidentally, the turkey still has the price tag on it ─ I don't remember exactly, but it was between $11 and $12. No damned way a turkey can be bought for that anymore!
I am going to brush my teeth now and then wrap up whatever I have left undone on this computer, and get to bed. It may by then be before midnight or by midnight, but more likely it will be a little past midnight. Right now, it is 11:41 p.m.
How is this Christmas Eve? I feel none of it.Yet I want to quaff another can of beer just before I go to bed, but I shall not.
I only want to add that when my wife left late this afternoon, she gave me a good big hug.
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