Fools and Security

What the devil is wrong with me?

I got to bed last evening maybe no later than 10:10 p.m. with my cellphone alarm set for 3 a.m. to get me out for the hobble I had outlined in yesterday's post, but after some sleep, I found myself unsettlingly awake. I was in fact agitated with money worries overwhelming my thoughts and mind.

Feeling some slight urinary urge, I rose and used the toilet, and returned to my bed around 1:17 a.m. or so. My younger brother was still downstairs with the T.V. playing.

I tried to sleep, but it wasn't happening. Eventually I heard him come upstairs to finally go to bed ─ I didn't know the time then, but it had to be around 2 a.m.

After just lying in bed for an hour or so since the bathroom, I felt that I had no option but to rise and spend time here at my bedside computer to await the return of assurance that I would manage sleep.

I had given up on the outing because I was too deprived and disadvantaged from inadequate sleep. I lacked the confidence at my age of 76 and in such a crippled state to be abroad in the wee hours even with the protection that I would bring along. Not being able to even run across a street means that if I met with trouble out there, my sole option for defence would be deadly offence, and I just did not have the combative mindset in my state.

So 3 a.m. came and went. At one point I heard it raining outside. Finally, just past 5 a.m., I felt able to try for sleep again, so back to bed I went. And I remained there for a little over three hours.

It was too late to seek some exercise out in the backyard tool shed because my younger brother would be emerging from his bedroom at any point (and he did do just that not 10 minutes after I had risen), and before I felt normalized to exercise in the shed, I would need a strong coffee and some time to drink it.

So home I remained, just as I have every day since this past Sunday when I handled the 8 a.m. hobble to the private liquor store half a mile from here.

I joined my brother for some morning T.V. a little past 9 a.m., and upon getting his invitation to start operating our Android TV Box, I led things off with a 1¼-hour (1:17:43) video published two days ago to Rumble's Vaccine Choice Canada channel: WHY ARE VACCINES EVEN LEGAL? with LAURA HAYES.

Laura Hayes, parent and long time vaccine risk awareness educator, will join VCC President, Ted Kuntz and Dr. Stephen Malthouse to share her thoughts on vaccinations. Laura passionately challenges the vaccines ideology. She has written powerful essays for the Age of Autism including: "Vaccines: What Is There to Be 'Pro' About?" and "Why Is This Legal?". Laura and her husband Rick are generous supporters of Vaccine Choice Canada. Listen and be inspired by this powerful mother and learn how you can take charge of your family's wellbeing.

Laura Hayes articles: https://ageofautism.com/category/featured-authors/laura-hayes/

Sarah Pope - The Healthy Home Economist: https://www.thehealthyhomeeconomist.com/

I won't identify which one, but next I tuned in one of the short vlog videos from YouTube's Ember channel.

That was followed by an old fairly short (10 - 15 minutes) interview with Shelby Foote, but I had downloaded it back in the Spring, and now in referring to my former source, the seeded video no longer plays ─ its original source must have been deleted or else made private. Consequently, I will not bother citing my useless download source.

We finished up with almost a half hour of a 1½-hour or so movie that I also will not identify until we are done watching it, but it was getting suspenseful indeed, featuring a young couple who had themselves dropped off (after a four-hour charter boat ride) on a remote uninhabited small wooded island where they planned a 10-day camping stay ... but it seems they are not alone there after all.

My brother sought further bed rest, whereas I fixed up a very filling first meal of my day. He emerged from his bedroom again before I had gone back to bed for a needed nap. However, as he was preparing to probably leave on foot for a bus to carry him off to social drink, seeing that it was already after 1 p.m., I finally did return to bed for maybe a little over an hour.

Towards 4 p.m. I was going to have some light exercise in my wife's vacant bedroom (she didn't come home last night), but I was feeling logy from my earlier meal, as well as stiffened and dulled of vigour.

So I tried something different ─ I gave the backyard tool shed a shot, hoping that maybe the chilly moist air would somewhat invigorate me.

And I suppose it did, for I managed three pull-ups and then just one in two sets of those exercises, then a pair of chin-ups in each of two sets of those, and I finished with the usual single pull-up between the sides of the old overhead children's ladder once attached to a small slide ─ the ladder is all I have for those exercises. I only held a dead hang for a 30-count at the conclusion of the final pull-up because my hands were slipping from overtop of the thick ladder sides.

Then I got at the four sets of partial assisted one-legged stationary squats performed between a pair of hanging ladder apparatus before engaging the usual 31 full flat-footed squats, holding the final squat for a 100-count before rising.

This was my normal morning routine if I exercise in the tool shed, but I have not done that now for two mornings. This time I added four isometrics exercises for my arms and upper body before going back into the house.

Honestly, I had thought that my earlier meal was laying so heavily that pull-ups and chin-ups might be out of the question.

Tomorrow morning I only intend on rising at 6 a.m. so I can do some grocery shopping when the store a half mile away opens at 8 a.m. Thus, there is not urgency to be to bed particularly early.

I am feeling a little forlorn, so I want to watch a Christmas movie and have some drink while enjoying it. At present it is 6:17 p.m., but I will return later this evening to finish today's post.

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My Christmas movie was 2018's Christmas Manger. And my source was this CineGo.co link. It was a little difficult limiting myself to one can of Cariboo Malt (8% alcohol).

The movie turned out to be somewhat Christian, but it had more than enough to keep this viewer interested. I don't know lead actress Andrea Logan, but she had lots of appeal. And I loved watching the interaction and bonding between the little girl played by actress Taylor Bedford and her 'adopted' grumpy grandfather.

I could watch the movie again with my brother if he was not drunk and was in a receptive state of mind.

I suppose it finished around 8:15 p.m., and as yet he was not back to keep Bev company, watching T.V. downstairs in the living room.

I could hear some raining outside.

My second selection was The Rookie ─ episode 12 ("April Fools") of season seven. I sure didn't expect this to be as exciting and even sweet as it turned out to be. And again, my source was a CineGo.co link.

A second can of beer was consumed.

The episode finished just ahead of 10 p.m., and to my considerable surprise I thought I was hearing my brother come through the front door at 10:01 p.m., but it was my wife.

My brother came through the door at 10:08 p.m.

I wasn't quite ready for bed, so I tuned in the sitcom Whitney ─ episode 18 ("Homeland Security") of season one ─ after pouring myself a good shot of D'Eaubonne V.S.O.P. Brandy.

The episode was fun! Weirdly, I don't recall the breakup of Lily and Neal last episode. Maybe I was too distraught or wound up to get into the episode? Whatever the case, this time my source was this CineGo.tv. link ─ notice the difference from the previous two links?

I wish I knew people. Women people especially would be really nice ─ people who enjoyed some drinking, and whom I could afford to be around or have around me.

Speaking of which, I never saw nor was spoken to by my wife. She shut herself up into her bedroom while I was brushing my teeth during the break between the previous two shows (I can take 15 minutes to brush my teeth, preferably lying down meantime).

I think I shall call blogging quits for today. Right now it is 11:36 p.m., so I will be to bed comfortably before midnight