Last Night's Aftermath

Following yesterday's truncated post, I sent a succession of furious and venomous texts to my wife over the total disappearance of the $1,519.29 balance that had that morning been in my private account at the financial institution where we have a number of joint accounts.

I had opened up that secret account several months ago because my wife would lapse and withdraw my money for partying and casino-gambling ─ she would sometimes blow her entire paycheque and then resort to my money.

A few times I have had a grand or more of my money disappear to the casino ─ to my grievous, agonizing impotence to do aught about. I do not even drive ─ I am basically housebound, except when I venture forth on foot.

I needed a means of securing our bi-weekly mortgage payments that are automatically debited from our main joint account by a different bank; and of course, I needed somewhere to keep my personal money safe from her. I only have pension income (I am newly 74, whereas she is 50).

So yesterday morning I had seen that somehow her chequing account was -$2,990.16.

Notice that the figure is a negative amount ─ for the previous two or three days, various negative balances were appearing, but yesterday's was the highest yet.

The only thing I could figure out is that she had gone into some credit arrangement with our financial institution, somehow getting them to extend credit on her account.

There is no way that she could merit such credit on her own standing ─ she was surely be using our joint status. But even so, I could and can not fathom how this was achieved without my signature to the arrangement.

Then late yesterday afternoon or early evening, I visited our accounts again. As said already, there are several ─ maybe a dozen are listed, although most are just sub-accounts that are empty or have only a few dollars as a balance.

Initially I though that my private account had somehow gotten deleted ─ approximately where it ought to be, there were only a few accounts with 0 balances, or maybe a few dollars.

Then I looked closely, and identified one with a 0 balance that had to be the account. I opened it up, and sure enough ─ the full $1,519.29 balance had been transferred out.

I then saw that my wife's negative chequing account was lowered in debt to -$1,471.67. And a check of its transactions showed that a figure of $1,519.29 had been transferred into it and of course been liquidated into nothing.

For some absolutely bizarre reason, either someone at the financial institution (I suspect one Jennifer, who had left a telephone message for my wife around 4:30 p.m. yesterday on our house line, asking my wife to phone her back) had taken it upon herself to pillage my private account's balance to apply towards my wife's debt; or else this same person had removed the 'cloak of invisibility' that had shielded my account from my wife's eyes, and in so doing had made it part of our joint accounts and my wife saw it as an immediate solution to reducing her account's debt.

And so my exasperated fury.

I am already paying as much as $800 in total each month to three credit cards that my wife racked up gambling losses with ─ all three are joint credit cards, yet two of the cards' accounts have never been used by me. However, since my name is associated with them, I am forced to make payments in a bid to bring down their balances. I froze the two that I have never used ─ they will thus never be used again. The third credit card is my own that I had stupidly loaned my wife a few years back ─ she took it to the casino. That card is now forevermore in my possession alone.

I could pay much less each month towards those three cards, but the balances would take insufferably long to pay off ─ I would probably die before it happened.

On top of those, my wife managed to get credit cards through other means that she is having to deal with on her own, for my name is not associated with those accounts. She became so delinquent on the largest of them that a lawyer firm was sicced on her, and last month she felt forced to make the first of what are supposed to be eight monthly payments of $810.

Her next such payment is due next Wednesday ... while on Thursday, our bi-weekly mortgage is due to be debited from my empty private account.

What really irked me early last evening was that each furious text I sent was not responded to ─ it was as if she was ignoring me, hoping this tempest would somehow pass.

I finally texted her that it might be best if she just did not bother coming back here (she usually spends her weekends and other free days somewhere in Vancouver ─ such is our marriage); and that she belonged in prison. I also said that I was going to bed, for it was approaching 9:30 p.m. and I meant to rise at 1:30 a.m. overnight to start readying for a five-mile+ walk.

I added that she was lucky that neither of her sons were up (one may simply not have been home), or I would be telling them everything ─ she fears their ire where her recurring gambling is concerned.

I went to bed ... but it was impossible to settle down. To relax into sleep was impossible.

Around 10 p.m. I rose and began to ready for that walk ─ I would have it early, despite the Friday night traffic. It would allow me a nervous outlet, and I would also be able to have occasion to vent my fury.

Around 10:15 p.m. I heard someone come into the house. At first I suspected my younger brother was back from his daily socializing; but then soon enough I heard the microwave get turned on, so I assumed that it was likely my eldest stepson.

And then my wife came upstairs, as calm as if this was just any other homecoming by her after working the day at the Thai restaurant where she is employed part-time.

She observed that I was dressed to be going out, and countered that it was raining. Could she instead drive me somewhere?

I said something along the lines of being surprised that she had showed up. At that, she looked at me quizzically, and asked, "Are you not happy to see me here?"

I then asked, "Don't you read your texts?"

I guess she must have soon thereafter made a check, and in great anger and hurt outburst that she didn't have to be here ─ she could go to Vancouver. She could later move right out if that was what I wanted!

Then she exclaimed that she had told me 'this and that' in the morning about the financial institution accounts, but of course she had not. I had asked her in the morning how it was possible for her chequing account to have a negative balance of nearly $3,000, but she claimed at the time that she was in too much of a rush to be away on her fairly long drive to work.

So I knew nothing.

Cutting this short, when she was in her bedroom, I casually went downstairs and left on my rainy walk ─ it was 10:24 p.m. as I set off, and she was not privy at the time to my departure.

I was to get a call from her at 10:34 p.m. in which she angrily said a few things I now cannot recall, and she hung up.

Later, at 11:45 p.m. I missed a call from her, but she phoned right back at 11:46 p.m. and I caught that one.

She was in Vancouver, she said ─ I could now come home, for she was gone.

She was calm, and even seemed solicitous of my well-being out there at night in the rain, so I said in turn that I was glad to hear that she made the Vancouver drive safely. I was maybe 1¼ miles from home and would be making it securely.

She claimed that she was going to repay my money on Monday ─ she seemed serious, so that will prove interesting. I did not point out about the $810 she must pay on Wednesday; and she has no idea that the next bi-weekly mortgage payment is due the day after that.

I was also calm. I love the woman ─ I just cannot easily tolerate her fool gambling and extravagance, nor her greed for credit. She consistently seems to regard a new means of credit as some solution to all of her current debts.

I don't know if she is only marginally intelligent, or just what may be amiss with her reason.

Above all, I am unable to endure her thieving. Sure, she takes the money, but at the time the idiot truly believes that she will be able to pay it back in fairly short order.

She seems incapable of understanding that if she has such funds coming that are to be accessible to her to make these repayments, then simply await them! It removes all potential conflict. Quit satisfying some immediate need for financial reward ─ whether it be money she pillages from me, or a new source of credit she has wrangled somewhere and that she will come to rue.

Anyway, I got home last night at 12:15 a.m.

Apparently she had to work today. I did get a quick call from her at 4:14 p.m. in which she asked me to put a single sausage ─ probably some special Thai sausage ─ into the fridge. It was well wrapped, and inside a large blue storage box kept beside the fridge.

We did text today during the noon hour. She said that she would e-Transfer me enough money to cover the negative balance of her chequing account later today. She claims to have lost her debit / ATM card, and has yet to acquire a new one, so I will need to make that deposit for her online.

Is she still somehow going to come up on Monday with the money taken from my account yesterday?

And make her legal payment on Wednesday?

I haven't a clue. I just hope that she is not going to be doing it by amassing new debt elsewhere ─ she seems to constantly live the precept of robbing Peter to pay Paul.

I am nearing the conclusion of another Sabbath fast that left me feeling especially tired today ─ I think that it is the caffeine deprivation most at fault. Nonetheless it has been tempting to spend much of the day in a state of torpor or even sleep in bed.

Will my wife come home tonight? She likely would not even if we were not experiencing last night's turmoil or conflict, so I am not anticipating that she will.

I sure would like to dig into a pizza later! But I am likely instead going to break my fast with beer and/or some spiced rum while watching a Christmas movie, and then fix up something here at home to eat.

By the way, this latter afternoon I had a naked weigh-in: 178 pounds. The weakness and weariness I am feeling had me rather thinking that I might register even less than that.

Enough blogging for today.