I never have the opportunity during the workweek to get away on any decent walks in the morning, even when I have felt possessed of the drive to be underway on such a venture as was the case the previous couple of days.
During the workweek I feel myself bound in service to my benighted younger brother who can do nothing to amuse himself here at home except watch T.V., so from 10:00 a.m. I spend at least three hours sitting with him and operating our T9 Android 8.1 TV Box to locate episodes of some of the T.V. series we follow.
Only on the weekends am I free from this service ─ I subscribe to weekend editions of two morning newspapers that he can pour over during the mornings as he enjoys his coffee.
And so all week I have been looking forward to getting away early this morning, only to find myself burned out and far too ill-slept to feel up to confronting the public ─ which I must do, since I do not live in the country or some remote setting where I can roam in serenity and privacy, unseen by anyone.
I found myself drained of all of any 'battle reserves', and thus unable to bear the miles and miles out there of traffic-heavy streets, seemingly endless homes and other buildings, and general overdevelopment and overpopulation.
How is it that I perpetually self-destruct like this? It brings me such despair.
Sure, I was up overnight from possibly 3:30 a.m. at most for perhaps three hours, but that is typical for me. As said, the previous two days found me practically afire to be off on some long, long walk instead of sitting in thralldom to my helpless younger brother late in the morning as I was doing, operating our Android TV Box.
He is unable to use a computer in order to fruitfully pass his time ─ he seems peculiarly resistant to learning the art. It is almost as if he deliberately refuses to comprehend or develop the basic skills.
And he does in fact proudly announce to people that he is a Luddite where such technology is concerned. He seems to wear that distinction with pride.
I feel so damned helpless. I do not drive ─ I cannot climb into a vehicle and drive some miles away to find some secluded location to enjoy walking. I am a total prisoner of my immediate environment.
I am becoming more and more of a shut-in as I grow older ─ more and more ineffectual physically and motivationally. After more than 70 full years on this Earth of ours, what natural physical reserves I have possessed are dangerously depleting.
Granted, the day today might not be to everyone's liking for a goodly walk ─ there has been no trace of Sun, and often there has been very light rain. This of itself was not behind my absence of motivation and drive today; as well, I do subscribe to some degree to the ability of such a change in weather to produce a state of ennui in vulnerable persons.
That may have been considerably afoot where my plummet in vitality has been concerned.
I could belabour this topic for my entire post, but I prefer not to. Allow me to depart from it and turn my attention to something else.
When I was up from bed early in the a.m. overnight, I of course worked on the post I am nearing completion at one of my six hosted websites.
That website gets few visitors, despite it being a decade or so old. I am lucky to see more than one or two visitors in a day when the check its WordPress statistics for any previous 28-day period.
Perhaps four days ago, I read of a new Wordfence website called FastOrSlow.com that almost exhaustively measures a website's loading profile by using as many as 13 different test locations all around the world, if this April 3, 2020 review at SearchEngineJournal.com is still correct: Free SEO Tool from Wordfence – Fast or Slow.
So I gave it a shot ─ my website is https://www.latinimpressions.com.
Right away I saw a potential conflict at FastOrSlow.com where my website's URL was concerned. FastOrSlow.com prefills "https://" (or "http://" if anyone still uses it); but then it suggests that the user supply their website's format to match "example.com".
What about those of use who have "www." after "https://" and before our "example.com"? Do we just omit "www."?
I had no idea. So I tried both versions ─ over and over. I had to keep trying because no matter what I did, when FastOrSlow.com finished submitting my website's URL to its tester locations, every one of them failed to access my website. A notice appeared that I was supposed to check and ensure that my website was actually online.
Well, of course it was.
So I tried one of my other six hosted websites ─ this one is hosted with a different website host than is LatinImpressions.com.
The very same thing happened. There was no trace of it according to any of the numerous test locations.
It was actually quite annoying, so I took my leave of the waste of my time.
The following day when I logged into my WordPress dashboard for LatinImpressions.com and checked the visitor statistics for the previous 28 days as I always do, I was agog to see that the previous day when I was testing the website out at FastOrSlow.com, my website had registered something like 148 visitors ─ an all-time high, according to WordPress. Remember, my website is at least a decade old.
Clearly, those several tries I had made at FastOrSlow.com were definitely connecting to my website ─ so why did FastOrSlow.com declare otherwise?
I never checked the visitor stats at the other website I had submitted for testing, but it stands to reason that there was a jump in visitations with it also.
I don't have plans to retest any of my websites ─ I am not interested in artificially racking up a false visitation record at WordPress. That false record of visits will now always be displayed as my website's all-time high until it is ever surpassed, and I am not in the least happy about this. It is a false claim to fame that I wish I could purge.
But I cannot.
Thanks for nothing, FastOrSlow.com.
Well, it's already after 6:30 p.m., and I want to get a bath started before my brother shows up from wherever he drove off to this afternoon. He arrived home at 8:00 p.m. last evening, so I felt obliged to sit up with him thereafter to catch us up on an episode each of three of the T.V. series we follow.
Maybe he'll be tardier this evening about getting home, and I'll be able to get to bed earlier than would otherwise be the case.
Tomorrow morning I have a grocery shopping expedition scheduled ─ a round trip hike of 5.625 miles. It's not quite the long hike I would like to be taking, but at least it well exceeds the mere two-mile round trip shopping excursion I undertook last Sunday morning ─ the last time I walked anywhere.
I just hope to heck that I don't find myself feeling as barren of vigour tomorrow morning as I did this morning. The hike would be in jeopardy.
oooooooooooooo
And here it is, 7:35 p.m., and I have had my vile descent realized.
Why can there be no deliverance for me?
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